Friday, March 18, 2011

A Day In The Life

Garbage Disposal

On a fine day in a special housing unit near you, I am sitting in the office, eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Actually, to be technical, it was an Uncrustable.

I see another officer bring an inmate out and put him in the holding cell. I don't know why. But there it is. The inmate looks upset. He is pacing around the holding cell and just acting crazy. So when the officer who put him there comes in, I ask him what that particular inmate's deal is.

What had happened was...

The inmate wanted something and he didn't get his way. So he began acting self destructive in an attempt to get what he wanted.

First, he swallowed a whole tube of toothpaste. Mind you, it was a travel size tube, but he put it all down anyway.

He didn't get his way.

He swallowed the toothpaste cap. It took him three tries.

He still didn't get his way.

He swallowed a toothbrush. Okay, again, it was a small travel sized toothbrush, perhaps about 4 inches. But it was still a toothbrush. And he swallowed it.

He finally decided he had enough and consented to be cuffed up and moved.

We called a doctor. And a psychologist.

1 comment:

  1. Let me guess, cell 146 at the Pen? He likes to swallow things to get his way.


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